Harold and Kumar go to the NASCAR race

Now, America is a land of many, many experiences. But there are few experiences as truly enlightening as a NASCAR race. Now, people who don't know NASCAR would tell you that its just a bunch of cars on steroids running around in circles and occasionally into each other (yes, you F1 snobs, I'm looking right at you). Well, it's WAAAY more than that. Now there's absolutely nothing that can equal actually going to a race, but after my most recent trip to Dover, I decided to tell you my

Top 10 reasons why I love NASCAR


#10 Size
This thing is HUGE. Dover is a 1 mile track and can seat 160,000 people. Thats a LOT of people, and they're all having fun. You can fit 10 football stadia into Dover Downs.

#9 I represent India
About 159,000 of these 160,000 people are white. So when Tim Lee and I show up, its the "Harold and Kumar circus" that's come to town. The burden of being ambassadors of 2.3 billion people is crushing. We speak impeccable English, and make no references to computers or graduate school. Also, no Osama Bin Laden jokes.

#8 The flyby
At the end of the national anthem (which everyone belts out - while eyeing me suspiciously), jets from the nearby Air force base scream overhead. At 300 feet above your head, they give you mild heart tremors. Very good to jump-start your love for this country.

#7 Weed
There's lots. You can take a walk in the car parks, especially those a little away from the field, and literally swim through clouds of the good stuff.

#6 Cops
Oh, they know. But they don't care. Also see #3.

#5 The race itself
Now, I do like racing. And so for me, watching these monsters whiz by at full throttle is pretty cool. My eardrums will never be the same, but thats OK.

#4 Chicks
NASCAR chicks are something else, I tell you. I befriended a couple this last time, an they were begging us to finish their beer. Which is really fantastic, and almost as good as them begging us to, well, you know.

#3 Alcohol
In the land of NASCAR, beer flows like water. I mean, it might be natural ice/bud light/MGD for the most part, but hey, who cares? They let you take your own beer to the stands, yo. (Hear that, NFL and MLB?) There was also this one time when off-duty cops had brought a breathalyzer. Sure enough, it turned into a competition of who would blow the highest, with charts and bets. I blew a 0.25, much to everyone's amazement (I wasn't staggering. Yet), and they all celebrated by, of course, giving me more beer.

#2 Rednecks
RVs with 8 by 6 foot confederate and US (and of course, #3) flags, pickups with bullet holes, cut off T shirts, sun burn, mullets. You get to see the whole thing here. But you know what, these guys are the most fun fans I have ever come across. Seriously. Way cooler than any other sport. With all the craziness that comes with the territory, I have never seen a fight, or even raised voices. There is a certain core decency with these people that is truly endearing. Sure, a bunch of them think that India and China are near Iraq, and they would rather stroll across the track during a race than vote Obama. But basically they're all right. If you're cool, they're cool.

#1 the Dover Monster.
The Eiffel Tower and pride of all NASCAR fans. Yep, that's a life-size car.