Another small dog. And this one's perpetually horny...

Oh Jesus, why do you torment me so? You all know I've had run ins with small dogs. To say that I do not find small dogs cute would be like saying Rush Limbaugh may perhaps have slightly conservative views. I hate everything about them. Hate. I have spent substantial amounts of time dreaming of ways to kill them. (I think I finally settled on feeding them into a blender. It seemed reasonably convenient, and might have worked, except that I realized I'd have to do a lot of cleaning up between dogs...)

Anyway, so when another of these dogs landed up in my house, I was not pleased. At all. Its bad enough that the thing yips and tries to grab food off of my plate and tries to lick my face with its filthy tongue, but then this happened last night when I was trying to watch TV.



See that look on the dumb mutt's face? What does it say? Well, low IQ obviously. Extraordinary ugliness, of course. But you see guilt? Just a wee bit? Well, I do. You want to know why? Because this was what was happening 30 seconds before.



That flurry of activity is the stupid dog trying to impregnate the hapless cushion. A sound kick to the behind stopped the mad pelvic thrusting, but now I'm wondering what other articles around my house have been propositioned by the damn dog.

Man, I got to go bleach my room...