Why cars are like women - one more reason

So you know how they say cars are like women because they're awesome, they're sexy, they are expensive, all that stuff. Well, here's another reason.

How your car behaves under stress can be determined by who drove it before you.

If someone totally messed with your car before you got it, it may look great from the outside, but every once in a while, you're in bumfuck Pennsylvania and you brake hard, and then the damn thing could just break. And then my friend, you're screwed.

ps: Of course, if you get a completely new car you won't have this problem, but then getting it broken in can be like pulling teeth...

When your Lower Control Arm snaps...

... when you're driving on a highway, it isn't a good thing. So for those of you who don't know, the lower control arm in your car is basically the thing that connects your wheel to your car frame, axle and steering link, so that the weight is held up by the frame, while the the steering wheel and the axle control turning and thrust. All in all, an important part of the car, unlike, say, the temperature control on the passenger side seat, or the light that turns on when you flip down the mirror in the sun visor...

So here is how a lower control arm should look:

And this is how my lower control arm looked at the local AAMCO in bumfuck Pennsylvania.

See that giant crack? Yeah, that happened to me when I was driving in PA in the middle of nowhere, at 50 mph or so. When your front passenger side just crumples, you know you're in trouble. Fortunately, yogi is endowed with pretty good driving skills, so apart from the slightly soiled pants, nothing else was damaged. Another stroke of luck: the car gave out right in front of a 7-11/gas station. Hello Indian people... (the dude was from Punjab, and was cool enough to let me abandon the car there - the tow truck didn't show until two days later).

It cost me a solid 800 bucks (a bit more) and a week to replace the control arm and the axle (bent out of shape), plus labor and towing. But on the other hand, I'm alive, so it's good. Phew.

Skinny Puppy at DC

I was just looking at some of my cell phone pics when I saw a couple that took a second to register. And then of course I remembered the concert. It's the one where the six foot tall Jewish girl (not counting her 6 inch platforms) that me and my buddies had gone with got thrown out for punching a somewhat overenthusiastic fan in the face. (The guy's dancing got somewhat muted after this incident. I also saw him get some ice from the bartender afterward, so I guess there was some shoulder behind that punch).

Anyway, if you think you're seeing a dude swathed in bloody bandages and wearing a dunce cap, you would be correct. That's Nivek Ogre, the frontman for Skinny Puppy - an awesome industrial band that you should really listen to. if you think their old stuff is a bit much to stomach, their sound has gotten more refined these past few years. But there's no mistaking who they are. Their music is fantastic, and their shows are even better. The guy showed up in a walker, mask, and bloody costume, which he then peeled off in layers as the night went on.


Oh, midway through, the dunce cap started smoking. And there was (fake) blood sprayed on stage. Certain to give the fainthearted some serious nightmares. In other words, fucking awesome.

But in the middle of all this, I do have one small request for people wanting to mosh. If you are a fat ass weighing in at more than, oh I don't know, a buck eighty, take it easy on the Indian dude who's there for the music, will you? Especially if you have long dirty blond dreads that whip around in three foot arcs (at eye-level on a crowded floor. Deadly), and if you are the sweaty type that wears no-sleeve tees (to an industrial concert on a cold November evening). Thanks.

"Climategate" destroyed.

I've had to deal with people asking me about climategate for a few days now, and to be honest, I wasn't *quite* able to convince myself that I was giving them a succinct argument as to why this whole made-up conspiracy was just that - made-up.

And then I came across this video, that in 10 short minutes absolutely destroys the whole argument. Fortunately, it looks like it's made by someone who understands the science and has linked to the original papers in question. Note also that there are no excuses made for Jones hiding data. But it should be noted that there's just a wee bit of a difference between one scientist talking about withholding data in an email, and the entire scientific community fabricating a global phenomenon over several decades.

So, the next time someone badgers you about the global warming conspiracy, don't slap your forehead (or their face). Hit them with this video instead.

Tweed Ride - Yogi is famous!

Who would've thunk that. Apparently if you hang around a Penny Farthing long enough you get your mug in the local paper. Either that or the combination of the Indian dude and the U-Haul was too much for the editor to resist. Anyway, just so you know, I am now officially a celebrity, so buy me a beer, will ya?

Yeah, I know, I got sandwiched (for eternity now) between Janet Jackson and Khaled Fucking Sheikh Mohammed. But you know how it is, you got to grab all the opportunities you have to tell everyone how awesome you are...

DC Tweed Ride photos

Finally, a chance to upload some photos that don't really do justice to what was a really awesome event. There's this peculiar little group called Dandies and Quaintrelles that decided that this fall would be a great time to go out and reclaim the streets of downtown DC for bicyclists. When wearing our best tweed, of course. Because that's how we roll.

The event was called the DC Tweed Ride, and a solid 500 people (at the every least, I should think) showed up on what was a beautiful fall morning. Yogi is not quite a morning person, especially in the absence of caffeine, but still I showed up to see this:

Yep. Absolute mayhem in some alley chock-full of nattily dressed DC locals in tweed, somewhere in Northeast DC.

There were accessories too. Pipes -

Moustaches (some fake, some real)

And a couple Penny Farthings. Awesome.


We took DC by storm. Well, we biked through a bunch of lights and used up all the lanes, which made us feel invincible (not bad for a couple hours a year). We doffed our hats often, waved our parasols, and there was a bunch of "Hellooo there"s and "Good Morning to you Sir"s and "Hip Hip Hoorah"s being dished out by the riders to somewhat dazed onlookers, who fell neatly into one of three categories:

1. What the fuck. Get out of my way, assholes. (These, to DC's credit, were few and far between)
2. Aw, sweet. Antique bikes and Tweed! And doesn't that Indian dude look cute. Clap, clap, and/or honk honk.
3. Man, what the fuck did that dude/chick slip in my drink last night...

But we rode on, undeterred.



We stopped over at the white house. The big man wasn't in, unfortunately... Schmoozing with the Chinese so we can still live happy debt-ridden lives, apparently.

And since no event is quite complete without a bunch of beer to wet parched throats (warm day + physical activity + tweed? Phew!) we went and got plastered at a local bar. I thought Marvin's looked like a speakeasy packed with one hell of a good-looking crowd that day... Good times.

Also, for photos that don't suck, and for English that's a lot cleaner, you really should check this link.

Back after a HUGE break

Like you care, pushupreader... Like. You. Care.

But still, I feel like I need to explain the absence. Just so I can get those rusty fingers working...

1. Work after sailing has been bad. Not busy bad. Worse. Not-Working bad. Nothing- Fucking-Works bad.

2. Got a talking to from the boss-man based on work being Nothing-Fucking-Works bad. Boss-man seems to think Nothing-Fucking-Works = Yogi-Ain't-Working.

2a. Getting a talking to from Boss-man is bad. As in, not I'll-cut-off-your-funding bad, but I'm-cutting-off-your-balls-in-front-of-everyone-let's-see-how-smart-you-are-now-asshole bad.

3. Surprisingly though, this hasn't spurred me into working harder. I just get pissed off a lot easier. And stew in my juices, instead of writing.

4. Also, there have been adventures, as always. These have kept me sane. Sure I'm going to blog about the pushy mother, ghetto cabin and broken axle. Of course.

But first, a nice pic from Seneca Aqueduct. it's a great place to go for a hike in Maryland on the banks o the Potomac, even if it's in frigid conditions.

There you have it. OK, enough of all this bearing my heart out bullshit. More writing coming.